So, how does it really work? How does anything work when it’s all just spinning out of control? Do you stop, check your watch, and decide whether you get or don’t get in line for another ride or do you stay where you are and just spin? And if you spin too much, what if you throw up? Do you even get to decide, or are you just supposed to spin? What is up to you and what isn’t?

At any given moment, the brain has 14 billon neurons firing at a speed of 450 miles per hour. We don’t have control over most of that. Thoughts, impulses… How can we control our life if we can’t even have full control over our body?  It’s never black and white. There are always shades of grey. I hate shades. If you’re a very obsessional person, then you can’t give up. You can never say it can’t be understood. You hate the shades, so you want to make them go away. So you never stop. You just don’t stop. You need it to be black and white. You will make it be black and white, if necesary. ‘Cause black and white, you can deal with that. And you so very much want to be able to deal with it. ‘Cause when you’re not dealing with it, it all starts spinning and spinning. 

I’m an obsessional person. I thrive on control. I need control. I always have to double-check things, i have to have a proof, i have to think over and over just to make sure i’m right. I need a clear picture, with a high resolution, i need the light to be perfect and i want it to mean something. Otherwise, it’s the spinning, and the confusion, and the doubt, and the blur, and the black-outs and…

Oh yeah… or you can just let go. But then who knows where you’ll fall down?